12 September 2008

destiny.. a little late.

I know that this is from a few classes back, but as I was flipping through bad cable one night in my townhouse this week, Back to the Future was on some channel, and I was too tired to find something else. What triggered me to randomly think about class was the classic McFly line, “You are my density. I mean, destiny.”

This got me thinking. Do we have destinies at all? And if we do, can someone be our destiny? The first question was easy for me. Yes, I do believe we have a destiny, or purpose. The word purpose is easier to dwell on, easier to grasp, but to me, they mean basically the same thing. I’m the product of very young, very optimistic parents. They play the lottery every day because “Somebody’s gotta win. Why not us?” My dad’s favorite line is “Everything happens for a reason.” And that statement I believe wholeheartedly. Maybe it’s because of the way I was raised, but it just seems to me that eventually everything falls into place. When I got denied sufficient enough financial aid from the upper-echelon colleges I applied to, it felt like my world was crashing around me. However, now, in retrospect, going to MCLA has been a lifesaver. I don’t have loans the size of some mortgages, and I think I’m getting a better experience then those old friends of mine at Emerson and Syracuse. Not to sound corny, but MCLA is evidently part of my life plan, or destiny.

Another question is am I shaping in my head as I write this is, is my own destiny forming in my subconscious, or am I living out one that was chosen for me by a higher being, like God? Being a product of nine years of catholic school, we learned we had plans, and God made our plans. It was our job to live good lives so that we stayed on track. In retrospect, is this ridiculous? I’m not really sure at this point.

Now back to the original idea… can someone be our destiny? Right now, at this stage of my life, some one person is not my destiny. However, my grandparents and my parents have both had long marriages. They’ve experienced the push from their significant others to change their lives for the better. Were my mom and dad destined for each other? Again, not to sound weird, but I believe they were. They help each other everyday to be better people and live more fulfilling lives. They worked well together to raise my brothers and I to be normal kids and to live valued lives. Maybe one day I will have that, but in the meantime I believe my friends could be written in as substantial parts of my destiny. I’ve changed a lot since high school, and evidently for the better. They’ve made me a better person, and oddly, more myself.

Destiny may be a fuzzy concept to most, yet for me, it’s a concrete one, one I believe in, and one I will continue to build upon.

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